Rhymes with:

Oh man. Big day. Just huge. For those of you not in the Western Garden Book‘s 14th climate zone, Mother Nature simply kilt it this morning well into the afternoon. I can’t think of a better day to lay into the bumper crop of lemons and oranges by making mimosas and marmalade.

Mimosas are becoming frighteningly common at our house, but when you’re looking at two grocery bags full of oranges it becomes a crime of necessity.

bag o

Our oranges are perfect for two things: marmalade and juicing. With no seeds to speak of they are really well suited for the set-it-and-forget-it nature of marmalade. That isn’t to say marmalade is easy. No, this is a complex venture involving pots and pans and boiling and churning and bubbling and, well, take this seriously. This was a good learning experience; not to mention I got to use this badass pot.

Impromptu reader contest: Take a guess at the volume of my pot and the closest without going over gets a jar of the next batch of marmalade mailed to wherever you want. Come on people, try your hand at a guessing contest. The real fun will be if two people get it dead on.

Here we go.

Orange Marmalade

Keep in mind this recipe is about ratios. This much fruit, sugar, water and everything yielded two pints of sweet stuff. If I get a hand on a bigger pot for boiling the goop then I can increase my yield.


4 oranges (zested into a bowl and then sliced real thin. **For Flair** Trim the rind off two oranges and zest two, then chop the rind up and put back in. A lot of marmalade recipes call for chunks of rind. It adds a lot of texture and looks beautiful in the jar**
2 lemons (same! seeded though)
6 cups water
2 cups sugar
1 tbsp butter or vegan margarine

Let’s see just how easy I can make this sound and have you be wowed at the amount of time stuff takes. It’s an investment.

Add fruit and water together. Bring to boil for 10 minutes.

Cover, then set in a cool place overnight. Have I lost you yet? I had to check back to epicurious like ten times before I got the times right.

Wake up, make coffee then throw it back on the stove. Bring to boil again and go until one of the fancy chunks of peel is tender. Eat one. It’s good.

Put the sugar in and boil again for 30 minutes. After that, simply can it! (I don’t think I should try to teach you how to can right now. Sally should. Sally start a blog please.)

Okay, I can try really poorly. I’ll once again break it down into overly simplified steps.

1) Boil water in a huge pot. Like the one you should have a guess to as to the volume of it. Have enough water in it to cover the jar and two inches.
2) With tongs, put the rings of the jars wide part down and place the jars on top of them. Keep them from directly touching the metal so they don’t break.
3) Put the lids to the jars in on top of all that.
4) Let them sit.
5) Get them both out and dry. Now fill them with marmalade. Then use the ring to put the lid on really fast.

Doesn’t it sound easy? Okay. Well I did all that and got this.

That is what two pints looks like. Great if we’re talking beer, less great when we’re talking marmalade yield.

Can we all just listen to “Danse Macabre” and make marmalade together? Can someone in the electronic world please do some sort of “mash-up” with this?

Charles Camille Saint-Saëns – Danse Macabre

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4 responses to “Rhymes with:

  1. twelve quarts

    i don’t know what unit of measurement you prefer, so that also equates to just over 11 liters, 48 cups, 384 fluid ounces, 24 pints, or 3 gallons

  2. Guesses should be in “cubic smoots.”

    If you win, don’t you think that’s a little unfair? You’re already getting a jar…

  3. smoots are a measure of length, not volume, mr boston (http://www.bartonbrands.com/mrbvodka/largeprodshot.jpg)

    also, you said the winner could have it sent anywhere — not necessarily to the winner. alright now i’m just being an asshole. bye!

  4. breakerbreaker

    Well it sure looks like “kipper” is in the lead.

    BEING THAT SHE’S THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS GUESSED!!!!

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